Remission a different look at addiction

Hi.

   One of my clients asked me to clarify how I view addiction, recovery, and remission. She was asking for a review of how I see the relationship between recovery and remission.

   RECOVERY is a word that is used a lot in the substance abuse field. I don't much care for it. Here is why.

1. It takes for granted that I have anything in the past that I want back. So basically it is saying that I can re- create the past in the here and now. I can't do that. Neither can you or anyone else. The past is over.
2. It refers to a steady state system. That somehow I will return to a place where I am OK. It seems to be saying that I have some sort of reset button where my "system" will be restored. I don't have a past "system" that was one that worked. I came from a sexually and emotionally abusive family, things were not OK. If I could "reset" I would end up addicted again.
3. The past is what brought me to my addiction. If I want to change my life I don't need to be looking at the past to create anything new. Most therapists will tell you how much time is spent trying to repair damage from the "past."  How the hell is going back there going to help me now?? Most therapists who aren't in it for the money will tell you that the past, and the emotions that are triggered by the past, don't get "fixed."
4. I can never say I am "recovered' and "permanently fixed" unless it's on my tombstone. There is no permanent fix for addictions, get real, they can re-occur (why we use the word relapse) at any time. Systems that claim they can permanently "cure" people need to prove to me how they can justify saying that unless they tracked the "cured" person to their grave.

   NONE OF THIS IS GOING TO MAKE ME POPULAR. IT GOES AGAINST ESTABLISHED NORMS.

  I DON'T CARE.

  I AM THINKING AND FEELING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION.

  MY HEART SAYS SO, NOT MY MIND.

I BELIEVE IN REMISSION.

   Here is why.

   After working in the substance abuse field as a counselor I noticed that there was a great number of patients that I would see again and again. Some of them had gone in to "recovery" more than once. If "recovery" was a solid state system you would not enter it more than once. What is happening if you have to "recover" over and over??????

   I had an opportunity to work with cancer patients and became familiar with the term "remission."
To "remission" (I see it is as verb) means to leave whatever mission you had (bulimia) behind. Re-structure your new direction or if you will your new mission in life. Re-your-mission-in life.

   YOU HAVE TO START FROM WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW. There will be little from the past that you will be able to use to create a new future. 

   Cancer patients know that in remission you have to stay aware of the FACT THAT IT COULD END and use new behavior to increase your odds that it won't end.

   And.

   YOU NEED TO CONTINUE TO BE AWARE OF THAT FACT. YOU NEVER FORGET THAT IT'S THERE. You have to be aware of the action of remission if you want to stay in remission. No guarantees but your odds increase. You find the tools that work to sustain your remission and stay with them.

   If you are in remission you will stay "On point" and not forget that relapse can occur at any moment. If you think you are "cured' then you can get blind sided at any time.

    I have so much respect for the Bulimia H website that helps my recovery. I know that they and some other site believe in being cured. I have some referrals if you are seeking that model. Contact me for Bulimia information.

   I am asking you to take a close look at anyone who is offering a "cure" from addiction. If anyone had a "cure" they would be Gazillionaires by now. Be aware. Pay attention to your body/heart/mind.

   I welcome your feedback, I need to hear what you think.

Love you all, Bryan